The Email I Avoided for Weeks

"Do you want to get your teeth kicked in?"

Not exactly the mentorship recommendation I was expecting.

But there I was—a seasoned executive who'd mentored dozens of people throughout my career—suddenly realizing I'd never sought mentorship for myself.

My colleague's warning should have scared me off.

Instead, it sparked something. Curiosity mixed with terror.

"YES. Who?"

Then I did what any rational person would do with this golden opportunity:

Absolutely nothing.

For weeks.

The excuses came fast and furious:

Will they expose me as a fraud? What could I possibly offer them in return? Do I even deserve their time? What if they say no? What if they think I'm not senior enough? What if this backfires?

Fear had convinced me that protecting my ego was more important than growing. I was paralyzed by the thought of writing one simple email.

Here's what's fascinating about resistance: It doesn't announce itself as fear. It disguises itself as logic, timing, and preparation.

"I should wait until I have more to offer." "Let me think about the best approach." "I'll reach out after this busy period ends."

But underneath all that reasonable-sounding delay was a simple truth: I was terrified.

During a regular check-in with Aaronde, my coach, he asked a question that changed everything:

"What's the one thing you know you need to do but are avoiding?"

I sat there, pretending to think. But I knew instantly.

The silence stretched. Aaronde waited. He'd mastered the art of uncomfortable pauses.

"I need to schedule that mentorship meeting."

"When?"

"Right after this call."

"I'll wait."

And he did. Literally sat there while I typed the email and hit send.

That moment taught me something crucial about accountability.

It's not about having all the answers. It's about having someone who won't let you hide from the questions you already know you need to ask.

It's not about motivation or inspiration. It's about removing the space between knowing and doing.

Sometimes the most powerful thing someone can do for you is refuse to let you off the hook. To sit in the uncomfortable silence while you do the thing you've been avoiding.

That email took two minutes to write. I'd avoided it for weeks.

Here's what those weeks of avoidance actually cost me:

Mental energy. Every time I thought about reaching out, I felt that familiar pang of anxiety and guilt.

Opportunity cost. While I was busy protecting my ego, I was missing out on potential growth and connection.

Self-trust. Each day I didn't send the email, I reinforced the story that I couldn't trust myself to do hard things.

Momentum. Avoidance has a way of spreading. When you don't do one important thing, it becomes easier to avoid the next important thing.

The meeting? That’s a story for another day.

But I’ll tell you this: the anticipation was far worse than any teeth-kicking I recieved.

What are you avoiding right now?

Maybe it's:

Your resistance isn't random. It's pointing you toward something important.

The things we avoid are often the exact things that would move us forward most. That's why the resistance is so strong.

Here's what I learned from that experience and hundreds of coaching conversations since: We all need someone who can help us identify what we're avoiding and why.

Sometimes that's a coach, a mentor, or a trusted friend. But sometimes you need to be your own accountability partner.

I've created a tool called "The Resistance Decoder" - an AI coaching prompt that asks the hard questions when you're avoiding what matters most. It's designed to cut through excuses with empathy but zero tolerance for BS.

Because here's the truth: Your future self is counting on the decisions you make today. And the thing you're avoiding? It's probably the key to your next level.

Maybe it's time to send it.

Not tomorrow. Not when you feel ready. Not when you have more to offer.

Now.

Open your email. Type the first sentence. Hit send.

Your future self will thank you.

Love,
Jeff